One of the blog’s I follow is of a sexist pedophile, yet I still read it.
I’m sexist?
His penis I mean. Not the ice cream.
Not on the first date, at least.
Maxwell - Pretty Wings
He’s just too good.
This reminds me of Mint Condition (y’all don’t even know about MC). They need to make a comeback and make some live band groove sexy music.
I was reading some dude’s OK Cupid profile last night and he mentioned that he would “straight up dump a bitch” who didn’t love the Shawshank Redemption. I wondered, do I have any such entertainment dealbreaker? When it comes to music, I think we are all allowed some passes because sometimes garbage moves your soul. A dude would have to be like, singing Linkin Park songs to express his love for me to say no thanks. I mean shit, I like Rockapella so, glass houses, you know.
When it comes to movies, however, I tend to be a little more, um, selective. Let’s call a spade a spade, I’m a fucking snob. Sure I appreciate bad movies on that “are these motherfuckers serious?” level, who doesn’t. But when it comes to “favorites” I’m not going to let just any movie into the club. So, do I have any movie dealbreakers? At first I said sure, duh, Vanilla Sky. But Vanilla Sky is less a relationship dealbreaker and more a life dealbreaker. Boyfriends, friends, family, whatever. Anyone who thinks that movie is “deep” is no longer a part of my life. I will immediately begin singing “Get Out” by Jojo.
So what, then, would be my dealbreaker movie, if any. There are plenty of shit films in this world but which one grates my nerves so bad that I’d give a dude the pink slip? Then it came to me. There is one movie so overrated, so undeserving of any praise or accolades, so “oh give me a fucking break”: The moment a guy comes out of his face with “Oh man, I loved Crash. It was so ‘meaningful’ and moving,” plainface goes into effect, the legs will shut and we’ll have to close up shop. Go directly to jail. Do not pass Go. Do not collect $200.
The movie’s heavy handedness is enough for me to give it bitch face, but the fact that it robbed Brokeback Mountain for best picture… don’t even get me started.
Office closes at 2.
and….. ROBOT.

It’s been about a week since I’ve scared some followers away with my raging and inappropriate lust for underage dick.
So here.
AC/DC - You Shook Me All Night Long
When I was little, I thought this song was called “You Should Be Alright Now”.

(via TXTS FRM LST NGHT)
WHAT DO I NEED TO DO TO GET TEXTS LIKE THIS???

For Kia
(via johnnyfive)
Oh my Mr. Ronald Billius Weasley…..I know Sunday is the Lord’s day and all, but excuse me while I go… you know…
FAP MASTURBATE JACK OFF