February 2008
Just like fergalicious def.
My great-aunt just called me glamorous… which is not at all an accurate description of me, but I don’t see her very often and I used to be so… schelpy growing up. So I guess seeing me with my hair down and in a semi cute outfit is glamorous. If you ain’t got no money take your broke ass home.
Throw Me the Statue - Lolita
This is the kind of...
Lets all give thanks to the tiny baby jesus
I am back in the 21st century. Just hopped out of the Delorean. I am again able to amaze people with the flip screen of my Sidekick 3. For months I was using this, my mom’s old phone:
What a piece of TRASH. People literally L O fucking L’d when they saw what I had been reduced to. And those assholes will get their comeuppance. Trust.
Johnny Greenwood - Proven Lands
From the There...
Be Kind Rewind
I must preface this review by informing those who aren’t aware that I 100% sweat Michel Gondry’s nuts. See evidence here. His childlike naivete usually makes for weird but interesting and fun movies and music videos. But I don’t know what was going on in that crazy french mind of his when he was creating this one… there was something off about it, something missing. The...
Jason Mraz - Dream Life of Rand McNally
...
“White people like to live in these neighborhoods because they get credibility...”
– Stuff White People Like entry on Gentrification. It’s like this post was written with exactly Columbia Heights (a neighborhood here in DC) in mind. They are kicking those negros and mexicans out of that neighborhood with the quickness!
Pharcyde - Passin’ Me By
Only .3% of...
A Haiku Lament for HD-DVD
Red disc, I picked you.
But was I daft to expect
Microsoft would win?
Jason Mraz - O. Lover
Can the curbside profit...
1 tag
In Bruges
The Not So Good: The thing about dark comedies is that from the jump, you pretty much know that some fucked up shit is going to go down at some point, but you’ll get to see some humor in the situation. In In Bruges, you don’t find out until about 20 minutes in the gravity of the situation and once you think you’ve come to terms with that, the shit gets even more effed. The...
Ryan Tedder - I Will Try
Ryan Tedder is the lead...
“Recycling is a part of a larger theme of stuff white people like: saving the...”
– From Stuff White People Like, which is a website with content that is both hilarious and true.
Star Trek Pushed Back to May 2009 and now I have... →
This is horseshit malarky. Or as Amy Winehouse says, fuckery. It doesn’t matter if you release this movie in December, May or the 12th of Never… PEOPLE ARE GOING TO SEE IT AND IT WILL GROSS LOTS AND LOTS OF MONEY. Not only will JJ fans (i.e. me) come out in droves, but have you heard of a little group called TREKKIES??? Putting it out in summer will be a disadvantage, if anything. The...
DJ Reset - Frontin’ on Debra (N.E.R.D./Beck...
Zero 7 - Somersault
All I have to say about this...
1 tag
Persepolis
The animation alone in Persepolis could have won me over. But BONUS, the story is also likable and, I hate to use this word, but Cute. The movie is an adaption of Marjane Satrapi’s graphic novel memoirs and tells the story of her youth in Iran during crazy civil unrest and wars and bombings and extremist regimes and all that. At times it was bit meandering, but I can’t really be...
The Stranglers - Golden Brown
This song is the...
“These people are BEYOND douchebags! They’re douche…rucksacks?...”
– The always on point Taylor, re: some of the more severe examples of douchebaggery on this site.
Girl Talk - Bounce That
Track 9 from Night...
“Hey dad…George… hey you on the bike!”
– Marty McFly. Back to the Future is one of the few movies I liked from the 80s that doesn’t feel dated, even now. Maybe it’s the whole time travel thing, or that sweet-ass suped up Delorian.
I mailed my absentee ballot today
I Baracked the vote.
Yep, I went there.
PC Load Letter
Goodbye piece of shit desktop computer that I’ve had since 2000.
You know, just to make sure.
Only Jack Bauer Can Make me Feel Safe
This morning, I saw no less than 10 DC Metro Police cars stationed at various corners, along Connecticut Avenue. My first thought was “motorcade”, as this is the road that Cheney takes from the White House to get back to his crypt of fire and brimstone. But there’s like, at least one motorcade a week and never that many stationary cops. Then I got scared.
The presence of law...
jacobbijani:
The Beta Band - Dry The Rain....
On "Smoking Aces" - this portion of the chat...
Taylor: have you seen narc?
Me: no
Taylor: narc is excellent
Taylor: same director...much more serious
Taylor: maybe ray liotta's best role
Me: lies
Me: CORINA CORINA thank you very much
Taylor: i said MAYBE (meaning, we don't count Corina Corina in judgments like this because it's untouchable)
Me: oh, good. we are on the same page
Me: like when i say "___ is my favorite movie"
Me: I don't have to say "Footloose", because that is assumed as the apex on everyone's list
Taylor: one day we'll get someone in office to change that law
Me: Well you didn't vote so you obviously aren't passionate about it like me
Taylor: is Obama a big Footloose fan?
Me: DUH
Taylor: he does have the "RIP Chris Penn" button that he wears
Me: True. And Kenny Loggins wrote his campaign song.
If you've spent countless sleepless nights... →
I don’t even know what to say about this product…
” Anal and vaginal lightening is one of the hottest skin care trends today.”
? ?
“We have thousands of men using our Lightening Gel to enhance the look of their penis, genital and anal areas.”
[Insert Sad Face Emoticon]
1 tag
U2 3D
Oh yeah… forgot to post about this. I don’t know if I can really give this a star rating. I mean it was just a concert. BUT IN 3 DIMENSIONS OF IRISHNESS! The Edge was like, right there. It made me want to be right in front at a huge U2 concert, but not really becuase I get crazy agoraphobic at concerts. But that’s beside the point, the movie/concert was great, and the 3D effect...
Revenge
I guess that voodoo doll Bridget Moynahan ordered worked…
"An Eye for an Eye": 2008 update
My jerk roommates don’t want to watch the Puppy Bowl. So, I’ll have to burn some of their possessions. Pretty fair, if you ask me.
ikea pwned me today
I spent something like $220, and I didn’t even buy any actual furniture.
Pillows
Wastebasket (also doubled as a stuff holder throughout the store)
Lamp
Light Bulbs
6 Shelves and accompanying brackets
Screws and Anchors
6-way socket extender
French Press
4 yards of fabric with which to make curtains
Curtain Rods
Glass message board
Now lets see how long this shit just sits...
Internet Explorer is like, the worst. I spent most of my day reworking my CSS because it looked all twek in IE. I mean who even uses that dinosaur browser? Dinosaurs, that’s who.
And for the love of puppies and rainbows, can someone tell me why everything in IE is rendered approximately 25% larger? Nasty.