April 2008
Washingtron, City of the Future →
I had some downtime at work today, so I decided to be completely unorig and start a group Tumblr for the DC Metro area. Stole the idea from New York Tumblrs, the layout from Heather Rivers, and the title from Vicky, who is the balls. I thought it would be aces if I had place to post my desperate pleading for people to hangout with/bars to get wrecked at.
There’s no auto add function (boo),...
Chicago - Hard to Say I’m Sorry
Man, I am...
Thom Yorke or Never-Ending Salad and Breadsticks?
FUCK! I just realized Mother’s Day is the same day as the Radiohead Concert. God damn it person-who-schedules-non-static-holidays! Fuck up my life, why don’t you!
Well, someone is just gonna have to be mad, because I’ve never seen Radiohead live. I can hear my mother now, talking some “RESPECT YOUR MOTHER” mess. I do. I really do. But instead of going to Red Lobster...
World Series of Flip Cup →
“World” is a bit of a stretch, but nevermind that. Saturday. B-More. Fools will be getting shut. down. You may recognize someone in the main photo on the homepage, playing in last year’s semi-final. I always bring serious intensity to my FC game, as evidenced by the wristband.
Jessica Haralson's JL Theory proven true!
Say one ill word about the lord of Web 2.0 and you WILL lose followers.
I am strangely reminded of King of Kong: Fistful of Quarters, the unrivaled megalomania of Billy Mitchell, and his legion of minions and fanboys who do his bidding.
I just don't understand why...
britticisms:
Jakob Lodwick would take the time to leave me a comment on a random Tumblr post: If you don’t like me, the next few years are gonna be unbearable. You will give in eventually, and the sooner you do, the less it will hurt.
There is no way an actual human being said those words. Lodwick comes across as Chairman of the Douche Board, but that seems a bit much even for someone as...
WatchIn Living Color - Chephus and Reesie
Hulu, how on earth do you have over 100 In Living Color clips, but not one of them are Men on Film?????
samreich: Coldplay - Violet Hill Coldplay is a...
WatchFlight Club - NYC
This is where I discovered that I left my debit card in an ATM in DC. You can imagine how heartbreaking this was. Well maybe you can’t, since you’re probably not a weirdo freak like me. I opened my wallet and I almost puked/cried/threw myself in front of traffic from the disappointment.
Attention Casey Donahue!! Look! So many!
Cats That Look Like Hitler dot com →
Too bad Eleanor Rigby doesn’t have a tiny lip moustache. I mean, I could draw one on her, but I would feel fraudelent. Authenitc Kitlers deserve the spotlight.
“Seriously, Force Choke has to be one of the coolest fucking powers around. I...”
– Darth Vader, reposted Badass of [Last] Week
I am in New York City
who has two thumbs, poor short-term memory, and left her ATM card in the machine in DC?
THIS GUY!
Confused
I’m on the bus (always classy) headed to NYC (o hai NYC Tumblars) and I just saw a Little Ceasar’s Pizza Pizza - I’m sorry, did we just drive to 1993?
Riskay - Smell Yo Dick →
jstn: I can’t stop watching this. The chorus stopped seeming dirty a long time ago. I have been privy to the stellar lyricism and musicianship of Risaky for quite sometime now. It’s one thing to have some hood ass bitches make a song with an accompanying tragic slideshow and post it on youtube. But this… an “official” video? I’ve known about it for days, but...
WatchHoly shit. I have been looking for this clip for years. Not joking - years. Gays in Space is one of the best, most underrated, and far too short-lived SNL recurring skits. Maya Rudolph kills it.
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Who said what to whom? / Oh, no, this is going to be intergalactic. / Hang on a second and let me pull myself together. Five. / Say what? Four. / Nuh-uh. Three. / Go...
Nine Inch Nails - Discipline
New track!
New...
Huh.
madeupmemories:
Dear Women of Cosi - Breast-feeding at the table next to us? Interesting choice. Your child may not remember this, but I will. Love, Jeff
Are you still in DC? If so, all Cosi’s in DC have the worst service in the history of food service. Worse than that place I saw once on TV that sells hotdogs and the staff yell at you and cuss you out and stuff. Well, let me be fair...
Earth Day... what the fuck ever
I can foresee myself offending more than half of the Tumblr population with this one, since Tumblr is crawling with liberal do-gooders of the Stuff White People Like variety. What exactly is the point of Erf Day? As Matt so poignantly asked: “Is there a higher purpose to Earth Day, or are we just supposed to remember there’s an Earth?” I find much of the talk of the current...
Dummies Falling for Romance Scams On the Rise →
So you mean to tell me that the extremely attractive and well groomed WHITE coal miner living in Ghana on a mission who claimed to love me after only two IM conversations isn’t REAL?!!?? Get the fuck outta here!
And please do NOT miss the romance scam site and the “Red Flags”. I would slap the taste out of my friend’s mouth if he/she fell for this junk:
They claim to...
On Apatow, his frat of loveable fuckheads and the...
In response to Jessica’s quote from Slate re: Katherine Heigl’s comments on Knocked Up. Also this bit about the current Apatow female leads vs. Freaks and Geeks.
I (silently) struggle with Apatow movies - on the one hand I love the most of the writing and the sometimes pure genius of the actors’ comedic timing. There’s no question that the people...
is this FCKNG guy for real? →
It's a pretty sexy morning in my inbox
Subject: Fill her up every night
Body: Upsize your hot dog - order this today
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Subject: Seduce her like this
Body: She will achieve pleasure easily when you are this big
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Subject: Seduce her like this
Body: She got banged real hard and the headboard was broken when we got up in the morning.
The 9 Most Racist Disney Characters →
I’m still pissed there’s been no black animated Disney main character. There’ve been a bushel and a peck of white folks, a Japanese girl, a Middle Eastern guy, although as mentioned in the article his skin is pretty white, a Native American, who looks about as unethnic as possible except for her earthy-looking buffalo skin dresses, an Incan dude, a Hawaiian kid… and oh,...
“Snobby psuedo-profound quote about some junk no one cares about.”
– Me
My Top 5 Artists (Week Ending 2008-4-20) →
Jamie Cullum
Panic at the Disco
Nine Inch Nails
*NSYNC
Bearbot
Imported from Last.fm Tumblr
1 tag
Forgetting Sarah Marshall
Did you see Jason Segel’s penis today? I did. Like 4 times. I didn’t really know what to expect from the movie: Produced by Apatow, but a romantic comedy? Let it be known that I don’t do RomComs. Only Love Actually, because that movie is the business. Jason Segel is adorable and cuddly and tall and goofy and makes a painful and pretty embarrassing breakup funny. The script...
I awoke to the pitter-patter of raindrops on my...
Drinking at 11:30 am is not really a smart thing to do. It just isn’t. However, drinking at 11:30am because one is an entrant in a regional flipcup tournament in which one’s team wins and one also wins Queen of the Table is a very good idea indeed.
Having a hangover at 9pm is but a small price to pay for glory.
Quiz
One of these is real. One of them Matt and I made up over an IM chat. Can you guess which is which???!?
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“This reality series will follow the day-to-day adventures as Luke navigates fatherhood with two teenage children, while running his adult business Luke Entertainment Group and planning a wedding with his straight-laced lawyer fiancée Kristin. Whether it’s...
In Limbo - April 18, 2008
Big Tymers - Still Fly
...
EnglishFailBlog →
(via sector19)
I don’t know what it is about FAIL items that fill me with such LOLz. FAIL boats, FAIL dogs, FAIL whatevers. They send me to the LOLcano.
Phoenix Down - The Ultimate Revival Beverage
sector19:
I’m going to let you in on one of my trade secrets. It’s called the “Phoenix Down” and it’s one of the things that makes my lifestyle possible. This drink will save your life someday, trust me. While there is no such thing as a hangover cure nothing will ameliorate your condition better than a Phoenix Down. And no, I didn’t just look up ameliorate in the thesaurus. You will need...
stereotypical tumblr user checklist
(via fatmanatee)
use a mac: iMac at work. Macbook at home. So sue me.
are twenty something: 25
take polaroids: no, but I take shots with a Holga, so I one upped you there
live in nyc: Nope
wish you lived in nyc: Not at all
draw sometimes: my hands are palsied when it comes to art, so no.
upload videos to vimeo to fit in: no. yes?
have a muxtape: 2
work for...
thank you stephanie for FCKNG my day up
Steph: they are re-making Teen Witch!
Me: BLASPHEMY
Steph: i immediately logged on to gchat to tell you
Steph: and guess who's in it. . . ashley tisdale
Me: why??
Me: why would you ruin my day like that?!
GChat out
soupsoup:
ashers:
I hate that I have a PC at work. I also hate that my Jabber is broken at home. EPIC FAIL. Adium
Ah, but Adium is missing the video chat functionality. Possibly a smart move since video chats are scary and sort of creepy, but ultimately, that’s the main reason why Ash is so jealous that her iChat is on the fritz when me and our other roommate are video chatting...
me: my tumblr crush reblogged me.
me: gasping
me: for
me: breath
Matt: uh oh... do you need a minute?
me: of course i took it a step too far and IMed him
me: ...no reply
Matt: good thing you've got me as an inferior alternative
Matt: It's like being Speaker of the House-
Matt: a lot of people would have to die... but there's a chance
me: not true
me: you're at least secretary of state in my tumblr crush hierarchy
me: maybe even VP
GChat out
madeupmemories:
peterwknox: Something happened where gchat is all of a sudden blocked at work. Very strange. As someone whose computer sits within the confines of his bedroom, I can assure you: it’s not blocked. It - like me - is just not working.
Use iChat loser. Wait, that was rude. I am using iChat and all systems are go.
