guesswhatijustread:

ashers:

djgroovyslug:

I don’t know what tickled me more, the text of the voicemail or the way he says all of it so matter-of-factly but it’s pretty much right out of a sitcom.

Oh Holy Jesus. If you do anything today - I emplore you to actually take the 4:27 and listen by far the douchiest messages ever left in the history of voicemail. Evar.

1. That. Is. Fantastic.

2. However, I have reached a point in my relationship with the internet where I assume everything is a viral marketing campaign.  It kinda takes some of the fun out of it.

1. Beyond fantastic.

2. I agree with you there Matt. I’m always suspicious. However, even if it was staged, I can assure you there are messages like that being left right this minute, in my office building, even. Ash and I can attest to this, living in DC, which has the most douchenozzles per sq. ft. This is a scientific fact.  We have a neighbor who I could 100% see leaving a message like this. In his madras pants and Sperry topsiders.