Hi, My Name is Kia.

LOL I lost two followers after posting about the March Madness pool. WUT?

Sat, 13 Mar 2010 11:51:58 -0500

They were all like “THIS IS OFF BOOK BETTING AND IT OFFENDS MY SENSIBILITIES HARUMPH UNFOLLOW.”

March Madness is upon us and who among you are willing to make a wager for greatness?

Sat, 13 Mar 2010 11:42:00 -0500

Why am I talking like that? We had a good time with the Tumblr Bracket Pool last year so I wanted to give it another try. Of course I have like triple the followers so it might get crazy but whatever, it’s called March MADNESS not March Calm and Tameness.

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Step 1: Leave your name and email address here. (If your PayPal account is under a different email address than the one you prefer to be contacted at, please leave that here also so I can know it’s you who’s paying).

Step 2: Send $10.56 to kiamatthews@gmail.com via PayPal. The 56 cent is for the dumb ass pay pal fees. If you don’t have a PayPal account get one. How can anyone alive who isn’t my luddite mother NOT have a paypal account anyway?

Step 3: Once you pay up, I will send you the link to join the pool with the password and also an invite to join the Tumblr March Madness group blog which can be used for all kinds of trash talk. (Just a heads up, you will need an account at CBSsports.com to join the pool, so do that now).

Step 4: After the field is announced on Sunday Mar. 14, make your picks wisely, make sure you have Duke losing in round one of course, and hope for the best.

The prize breakdown will be as follows: 50% for the winner; 30% second place; 20% third place.

Last year, ardenashley walked away with the win. This year it could be you with the bragging rights and extra money in your pocket with with which you can buy anything you desire including but not limited to shoes, dvds, or drugs.

Let’s do this kids.

Musically Oblivious 8th Grader strikes again!

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 08:40:00 -0500

Musically Oblivious 8th Grader strikes again!

Sometimes... it's hard to believe that David Karp is only 15 or whatever. And sometimes... we are reminded.

Thu, 11 Mar 2010 23:04:00 -0500

And here I thought posts of the Stir the Shit variety were saved for us small time tumblrs.

Oh.

Really, no one cares, kid. But you know better than to put that shit on Tumblr. Or was that an attempt at being funny? Yikessss….

Noooooo Alex NOOOO WHY WHAT WHO

Thu, 11 Mar 2010 20:49:00 -0500

That little chicken little looking child is still there but they sent Alex home? This show is full of mark ass bustas, I swear.

ANOTHER ONE. What you got? FYI, Matt made this one so direct any...

Thu, 11 Mar 2010 14:59:00 -0500

ANOTHER ONE. What you got?

FYI, Matt made this one so direct any sassiness to him. I’m talking to you Kapi.

Along with Web Content Management, I also provide professional...

Thu, 11 Mar 2010 14:27:29 -0500

Along with Web Content Management, I also provide professional virtual babysitting services.

Audrey is my only client, but I look how easy it is. She sits there, I watch her bobble around and drool. Easy money.

Apparently the trivia Matt and I made this week was like the...

Thu, 11 Mar 2010 12:34:00 -0500

Apparently the trivia Matt and I made this week was like the most difficult thing ever. What I don’t even. So I’m thinking to myself, did we make it too hard that’s what she said or does everyone else just like, suck at this game?

Matt and I made some name that tunes for each other to test our skills to see if maybe it IS too difficult. The verdict is that we’re awesome at this and everyone else needs to get on our level.

LETS SEE WHAT YOU GOT PEOPLE. Guesses? (Sorry about the 4 seconds of dead air at the end).

monkeytypist: Deeply disappointed that you didn’t spot the error in panel 2 - the Dwarves were the...

Wed, 10 Mar 2010 23:44:28 -0500

monkeytypist:

Deeply disappointed that you didn’t spot the error in panel 2 - the Dwarves were the creation of Aulë.

… Except that I suppose you could say that it’s implied that like the Ents and Eagles they were original, albeit hidden, parts of the original Music, and that nothing inside Eä exists that does not have its ultimate origins in Eru and I’m just going to stop talking right now.

I did notice that! But the very fact that Eru Ilúvatar did not destroy the dwarves as Aulë expected and blessed them with the Flame speaks to the very fact that you mentioned “nothing inside Eä exists that does not have its ultimate origins in Eru”.

Is there a good still or gif of someone doing that thing where...

Wed, 10 Mar 2010 22:53:54 -0500

Is there a good still or gif of someone doing that thing where you pull your lips into your mouth and hold your first to your mouth and close your eyes? If so, insert that here.

This is so relevant to so many of my interests. BRB crying real tears of joy.

Wait a minute.

Wed, 10 Mar 2010 21:50:02 -0500

I lost 3 followers after mentioning that I like watching dudes humping but I didn’t lose any after talking about someone jizzing on a pizza and eating it? Y’all are a mess.

WHO THOUGHT IT WOULD BE A GOOD IDEA TO MAKE ANOTHER GOD DAMNED CUTTING EDGE MOVIE?

Wed, 10 Mar 2010 21:27:54 -0500

Fire and Ice? Put a bullet in my brain please.

what's your favourite kind of porn? (asking as a fellow female porn appreciator)

Wed, 10 Mar 2010 21:15:00 -0500

Two muscular bros broing it up Sodom and Gomorrah-style. Which, I’m convinced, is what’s happening behind closed doors at Frat houses across America right this minute.

Excuse me as I kiss the sky

Wed, 10 Mar 2010 20:36:44 -0500

Excuse me as I kiss the sky

You know what's like, mad spirit-crushing?

Wed, 10 Mar 2010 14:20:51 -0500

When you start following someone, and later that day you visit your stat tracker and see that they visited your blog yet they didn’t deem you worthy of a follow.

This makes me sad to the maxx. Or something.

triviatuesday: Ok dummies. This week’s participation is like,...

Wed, 10 Mar 2010 11:41:12 -0500

triviatuesday:

Ok dummies. This week’s participation is like, the worst. Matt has done a re-edit of the 5 songs, this time with the CHORUS of each. I will weep if no one gets this.

I will personally email everyone that follows me with a rude letter calling you, your mom and your unborn children a bunch of dumb dummies if no one gets this.

Internet porn, it's been real, but you gotta get out of my life.

Wed, 10 Mar 2010 01:16:23 -0500

The day that my innocent browsing for tasteful pornographic imagery finds me running across a clip entitled “Cumming a big load on a pizza and eating it all” is the day I take my leave.

I’m a biiitch. I’m a biiiiiiitch. Suck my...

Tue, 09 Mar 2010 23:37:48 -0500

I’m a biiitch.

I’m a biiiiiiitch.

Suck my diiiiick.

I’m a bitch.

YOU DO NOT SING SONGS BY FORMER AMERICAN IDOL WINNERS ON AMERICAN IDOL

Tue, 09 Mar 2010 20:09:28 -0500

WHY? It keeps happening.

You are not Kelly Clarkson ok just stop it.

What? If you’re going to stoop so low as to pay for...

Tue, 09 Mar 2010 18:07:00 -0500

What?

If you’re going to stoop so low as to pay for readers in the Personalities section of all places, how about you at least write some coherent sentences that don’t sound like a fetish ad on Craigslist.

I can’t.